Tuesday, December 19, 2006

Housewarming...

This was supposed to be up over the weekend but due to unforeseen circumstances such as:
1. soccer playing
2. soccer watching
3. sleeping
4. Dota-ing
5. Korean drama watching
6. Reading
7. Slacking

the post is overdue.
But heck, its hard enough to find a blogger as it is, so no complaints ye all.
Anyway, here's some of the pictures from the memorable day when we raided Jase's 'house'.

 
Goose saying hi. Or something like that lah.


The whole chink-gang. Minus me(who was the camera man) and Berd(who was in Genting, song bo!)


Food... glorious food!!!


More food and people.


Evidence that we were raiding Jase's house. Well, some of us anyway...

And now, some pictures of the couples...

Pegs and Sw(dunno why he must look away and act cool sia...)

Goose and Kimberley(hope I got the spelling right :p)


Biwen and 'Billy-Pimp' Ong


Last but not least... our hosts: Jase and Huiwen. (Billy-Pimp Ong, why you standing behind......)

To the rest of the couples who were there but no pics taken, I blame it on my laziness. :)

Overdue post,
overdue house-warming party.

But at least it was fun...

So who's house next?

Friday, December 08, 2006

Long overdue post. Great outing...

Long overdue post, seeing how 'frequent' this blog is updated.

So to those who went Tibet, or those who have blogs.
Update more than once in a while?

Anyway, this blog post might never see the light of day if not for the fact that we were all possessed by some midnight madness and decided to do this: 


Bowling. Yes. We were mad. (PS: This is Xw looking quite pro. The rest I never take cos too lazy liao...)


The 9 insane boys.
Standing, from left: Jase, Xw, Jeff, Seng, Ed
Sitting, from left: Sw, Gs, Me, Berd

Other antics will include:


Me and Berd, with nothing to do outside...


Something that Jeff always kena...


Berd trying his best to pose with a kick-ass face. You know, the kind of face that you see already you wanna kick his ass?


The teams that didn't have enough luck to win.


The lucky ones.


No, Xw was the bowler. Jase was the one with the 4 X. Its called... a 4 Bagger. First time in my life I've seen it. (Nabei Jase.... you bruff us all, say what dunno how to play? Tsk tsk...)

Too bad I forgot to bring my camera down for the TT Durai part.
But then again, there was nothing much at the end.

Video... might or might not be up.
Depending on when I have the time to do it.
Plus if its idiot proof enough for me to upload it and shit like that.

Good games guys, we should do this more often, next time with better plans, more balanced teams, and no doubling of captains' points.

PS: Those who want the pics let me know.... will charge small fee for burning them into CD. Ciggys and 'soccer tips' videos are acceptable forms of payments.

Tuesday, June 27, 2006

BerD @ Diving!

Alright, I was away for a good 4 days on a diving trip @ P.Tioman... And I better have some pics to show for my absence... Cos knowing you guys... You guys probably missed me a hell damn lot! LoL

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Here's my buddy, a babe and me on our dive boat...

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And that would be diver me underwater... Damn it dont I juz look pro in that suit? And I know Xuanwei is probably asking himself this so here's my answer... Yes, my Anaconda hurts having to squeeze into that tight wetsuit...

However, diving underwater somehow got boring... So during our surface interval (we need a certain rest time above water otherwise we'd get high underwater due to excessive nitrogen in our blood)... I started jumping off the deck of our dive boat... LoL! And how high would that be? Abt 4 metres above the water level...

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Beginner: BerD - Ninja Diver! RAWR!!! In reality, I did a perfect flying kick in midair... Juz that this pic was taken a split-second late... To see my kickass kick, check out the video from the link here - Ninja BerD!

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Intermediate: BerD - Doing my forward roll. LoL damn it I look damn pro lah! Too bad there isnt a video to show... =( If it's any consolation, this is my buddy doing the forward roll... Not bad also man... LoL

Buddy Forward Roll!

And after a while, we got pretty confident... And so my buddy tried a Backflip! Not bad eh? Quite easy hor? Like very simple hor?


And so my buddy jio-ed me to do a backflip from the top deck again... I've got no idea why but I agreed... It didnt occur to me then that it was more than juz a crazy thought... It's a FuckiN' crazy thought lah!

Cameras ready...

Jimmy, our dive master, gave the timing... (Which wasnt very smart... Cos... If in any case any of us had 2nd thoughts abt doing it... It'd be too late to pull out...)


5...



4...




3...




2... (BerD mutters: I'm Fucked...)





1...


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Advanced: Crazy, juz crazy... Juz from the looks of it... You can probably guess I was really fucked. LOL!!! And here's the video proof of how mampos I was...

Video: MamPOS!

If in any case by now you guys are probably thinking how n00b BerD is... Well think again. There's a million and 2 things that can possibly go wrong when attempting a roll of any sort... Here's an example: (Viewing discretion advised.)
A million and 2 ways how a roll can possibly go wrong...

Alrighty, enough of me... Time to sleep... Ukraine juz won the penalty shootout... And the match sucked real bad. Won money though...
- 1st half draw
- TG under 2

YEAH!

Oh and a million and 1 thanks to Shaowei for helping me out with my subject registration... Thanks a lot bro! You're a real bro!

Thursday, June 22, 2006

Crouch of Many Talents

Alright guys, there is no hiding of my utter disgust towards England and Sven Goran Eriksson's approach towards their World Cup games... And now compounded by the fact that Owen's out injured for 5 mths or so... We'll definitely be seeing more of Peter Crouch and more long-ball-to-pick-out-Crouch tactics... Sianz.

And it's not like Crouch isnt good with his feet as Rafael Benitez has already found out...
Behold: Peter Crouch and His Many Many Talents!


Acrobatic stuff.



NBA JAM 2006 - LoL check out his face man...





"My Life for Na'zul!"








WOOO HOOOO!



WOOO HOOOO HOOOO!






Coolness o.O - There's even motion blur on this one!


I KNOW YOU ONE! - LoL would you guys juz check out his face again? Classic dah!

(Credits to edmw for original post)

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

24, going on 14...

Long time no see new posts on this blog liao.
Too long without any field soccer for us to have anything remotely interesting to talk about I guess.

But we did had an 'snap recall' for soccer on Sat.
Night somemore.
Was after the Man U match(damn!) when I think the loss devastated some of us so much that we decided to have a soccer session to erm... vent our frustrations?
Calls were made, male egos were provoked, and in the end, we ended with 10 guys in...

Lim Bang.
Late at night.
One bunch of crazy guys behaving like kids.

Honestly, when was the last time we ever did something this mad?
the 05 chalets where we play in the dark = Daren knocking his teeth on the lamp post?
The chalets at East Coast where we went Bedok to play?

Can't remember when was the last time where we had such fun playing our heads off (the one on top, not below...) with such wild abandon.
Flying balls, flying expletives, flying bodies... nah, though it would've been nice to see some flying bodies.

Thank you guys, for a night of fun.
Berd, Ed, Goose, Jase, Phil, Moks, Xb, Xw.
Thank you, the ladies of the Soccer First Wives' Club for taking some of these beasts(wait... that means me too, haha) away from spending time with ye all.
Thank you...

You guys made me feel like I'm 14 again....

PS: Really, who was the one who claim that the Lim Bang lights will be on 24hrs?

PPS: Jase, you should dedicate a blog post to us professing your eternal gratitude for coming down to play with you!!!

PPPS: MSN Conversation with Berd(da Nerd)...

Timmy: i hope they sell ciggys there

BerD: They grow them gawd damn it...

BerD: We're getting it free...

BerD: You blardy noob!

Timmy: are u sure

BerD: Yah..

BerD: Unless those blardy sheeps ate it.

BerD: And goats grazed it.

Timmy: then we smoke the damn sheeps

BerD: OMG.

Timmy: ?

BerD: That's like the most gosu suggestion I've heard so far on the Tibnet* (note the spn-elling mistake) trip!

BerD: Smoke sheeps!

BerD: WuMaiGawd!

Timmy: y thk u

Monday, March 20, 2006

Match Report 6

No mood to do this damn report since the match was cancelled halfway.

Anyway let's just have some highlights of the game.

-- Guolin's Ultimate Save of the Season. He's one handed save ala a Van der Sar(minus the height and the look) that in Berd's words, employed all his strength and dexterity to push the ball JUST~~~ right for it to whack the goal post and bounce out. Solid.

-- Guolin leaping like a salmon to grab a corner kick by the opponent, reminded us of Dennis Rodman grabbing a rebound. But we all felt that the shen tou(the godlike Thief) should've taunted the opponents by slapping the ball and screaming: Is that the best you can do?!?!?!

-- Berd's gosu volley in the 2nd half that screamed of a goal, but was denied by the horde of bodies blocking the goal. How sad sia, the only time that he actually hit something and get it on target he was blocked.

-- Jase's horrific miss in front of goal. Tried to sidefoot but his side wasn't good enough(this is by the Snake). Nuff' said.

-- Timmy's NOOB-ish behaviour when confronted with a *who-kicked-the-damn corner that eluded everyone and he suddenly developed psycho-motor random coordination and was torn between using his Head or his Feet. Ended up using his Knee. Noob.

-- Beng's shot that warranted a save from the opponent keeper. Almost went in sia, as Berd claimed: The ball was going in from the inside of the post.

-- F**king cricket players. Really bastards them. Never use the whole field still want to make so much noise. I can't even begin to describe the angst we felt when the security uncle came over and told us that we cannot use the field anymore. What the fcuk sia.... These bastards should be deported back to India asap. With the bats in their arses.

And that's all for now...

Monday, March 06, 2006

Match Report 5

Date: 05/03/06

Location: The NTU small side field which was made smaller by the inconsiderate crickets.. I mean cricket fuckers, I mean players.
I cant agree more man... Those sonnawabeeteches... taking up so much space on the field(s)... Why cant they juz take up DOTA and start playing at their comps peacefully and all...

P.S: This could well be the 1st time I've seen The "Negotiator" failing at negotiating... LmaO!


Time: 930-ish. Cos lim bei was late. And I was ferrying Ed the halal pig and Weitian the new signing.
That noob Timmy actually did a BerD... Not responding to calls, SMS and watever means of communication... Eh bro... Juz a word of advice: If you cannot tahan the CPZ... Juz stop lor... I mean not everyone got that kind of stamina to last de...

On a more serious note, your failure to turn up on time really caused us quite a bit of embarrassment you know anot... Towards the end, the general concensus agreed by all RECCOS members present was to start with 9 men. I dont blame Mokielele for lashing out at you when you arrived man... Cos I think he understood the pain of organising a game and having to deal diplomatically with the opponents... Basically... YOU NOOB!


Score: RECCOS 4 - Berd's Friends 4

Scores: RECCOS - Weitian, Weitian, Weitian, and Jase.
Berd's Friends - Dunno who the f**k score. Berd can fill this part.
Fill up this part? With pleasure!

BerD's Friends - TzeHao (OWN GOAL), Iskandar (Or however it's spelt), Joos, Yuan Hsiang


Match highlights:

-- BILLY aka Ong TzeHao SCORED A FREAKING OWN GOAL MAN WTF! THAT NOOB! Apart from celebrating and the colour of the jersey he was wearing, from the way he scored that own goal, anyone would have thought he was one of them!

-- The freaking cricket muthaf**kers. Play cricket big fuck ah? KNNBCCB, keep telling us to stay outside the flags cos we're distracting their game. FUCK lah!!! They are the ones distracting us lor. Bunch of buggers taking up so much space, hooting and cheering when their balls are floating nowhere, threathenin to call security(for fuck?!??!). CCB, our ball so big size also can hit into their side, theirs small like fuck also can't fly far, make so much noise for fuck.....
Yah balls... They should juz organise weekly Sunday morning outings to Tekka Market and whack their Nasi Brayani and their teh-tarik and leave the field to us...

-- The collapse of both our flanks. BOTH. I admit I was playing a super below-par game on Sunday(sorry Ed, I shall curb my excessive CPZ-ing) but poor Billy was simply outplayed by the opposing wingers. Thus leading the the flood of goals that came in.
Honestly, the defense was pathetic... Although the centre pair of Snake and GooSe were not up to par by their high standards, the wing-backs were practically non-existent. The crosses were flooding in from both sides and towards the end of the 1st half... The wingers were even able to cut inside and take pot shots at goal! WTF? Well... It's not everyday you see our defense playing badly so hopefully it's juz a 1-off incident!

The match also showed how weak we're with juz 4 men in midfield... Somehow or rather... We cant play 4 in midfield... From where I was standing (outside the penalty box even though I was the keeper) I could tell after 5 minutes our midfield consisting of CR (L), Beng and Mokielele (C) and YY (R) were unable to contain the opposition... Hence I took it upon my-GoSu-self to change our formation from 4-4-2 to 4-5-1... With Jason being withdrawn as striker to play a more central role, leaving Weitian at the point man up front... And of cos that tactical change proved to be masterful as Weitian went on to score a hatrick and ourselves, playing better especially in the 2nd half... Damn I rock.


-- Snake and his bleeding nipple. Actually not really. Apparently he sliding tackle some guy, the guy's trailing foot had no place to land, so lan-lan nearest flat surface to put the boots on. Snake's chest. Thereby the bleeding. But I am still amazed, how come the bleeding area is around the nipple? Snake, care to explain?
Yah I didnt see what exactly happened but... Would you like Sf to take a closer look at it? He's afterall a Medical Student...

-- Berd's cock-sure but kinda shagged run that led to Jase's goal. Berd da Anaconda managed to pick up the ball in defence, twist and turn(and refuse to pass the ball I must add) and somehow just.... manage to squirm his way through the opposition, started an uninterrupted run down the right flank all the way to midfield and beyond, passed the ball to Jase, who, in typical fashion, ran till there was no option was passing, and decided to take a shot and started praying. It seems like someone up there hasn't forsaken da Lakeside kid(yesh, must remind everyone the fact that Jase is out of the BP district. Muhahahahahaha!!!). So he scored. Us lazy buggers who refused to run managed to put up a false front and shamelessly pat Berd on the back, telling him "Good Run". I'm impressed.
I think this short paragraph isnt doing the amount of effort I put into that charge down the field any justice at all... I shall elaborate on it... I DONT CARE!

It was (probably) into the final minute of the game then when everyone else out there was too tired to run and were all resigned to losing this game... EVERYONE, but BerD. As everyone stood (lazily) around the penalty area awaiting their corner, GoSuBerD was vigilant to spot a short corner about to be taken... Racing over and catching Joos unaware by sneaking from behind his blind spot... Latching onto this opportunity of a lifetime... GoSuBerD started an UNSTOPPABLE run, equalling that of Ryan Giggs' magnificant effort displayed in the FA-Cup Semi-Final of 1999 (I think...) down the entire length of the field, skipping past 2-3 players and finally arriving at the opposition's penalty box, alone. Or so he thought. Fortunately for RECCOS, Jason, also too lazy to run back to defend, found himself in acres of space and on a full tank of oxygen + nitro (Of cos lah - he didnt have to run the entire length of the field unlike GoSuBerD...) With a perfectly weighted pass to Jason's feet... Jason was left with juz the keeper to beat. Humji-ly, he blasted it past YuanHsiang, their keeper then...

Having played such a major role in such an important goal... It was felt like bliss... Ahhh... And when those hommies paid homage to the Great One... Ahhh... CoOLnEsS!


-- Snake's 'comments'. Snake kept his cool. Exploding only on our players. Me, Billy, Ed, CR, Jase(even though the poor bugger was playing keeper, snake shouted at him to run and cover sw in midfield. I couldn't stop laughing) even Beng had a taste of the acid tongue. If it helps curbs the beast in you, Mr Snake, call us BITCHES!!!
Yah man... I was like so shocked when Snake had something to say to Beng even! "TECK BENG WAT ARE YOU DOING? PLAY PROPERLY LAH! -- MIDFIELD STOP LOSING THE BALL SO EASILY!"

Honestly ah... We're already damn shag lah deh... Wanna pass properly also hard leh... Haha even Mokielele told me halfway thru the 2nd half he's shagged can? MOK DONT BLUFF! I KNOW YOU ONE!


-- Chong Rong's cramp, which led the Sw da Regular making this kick-ass comment: "Wah CR, i think your record for RECCOS is 1 cramp per game sia, every game sure cramp one!" Totally senseless but it was pretty funny.
Haha... Yah man CR! You dont train up hor you're gonna be banished to standing in between the posts I tell you! And hor... We're really damn evil leh... People cramp liao still gotta be keeper... Damn jialat leh play for RECCOS... No welfare de...

-- Last but not least, our Hat-Trick Hero: Weitian. He has totally earned his passage(ie the free ride from CCK to NTU and back) to the game. First goal was a glancing header off a deep cross by Sw(I think) that went in ala a Darren Fletcher. Second goal was classic, a run to meet the pass, a subtle flick of the boot, and next thing we know, the ball eluded the keeper and ended up at the bottom end corner of the goal. (although the man himself confessed that he was hoping to flick the ball away from the opponents.) Hat-trick goal? Our star striker(for this match at least) received the ball, he turned the opponent, pulled back his leg, and let loose a lobbing shot that once again eluded the keeper and ends up at the back of the net. Sweet.
*Damn, I forgotten at which goal did Beng asked for the ball and Weitian just took on the world himself and scored. I think it was the last goal. Beng was humbled. Right?
Yah... But what you guys dont know is... Beng even asked me not to keep passing the ball to Weitian! He said he's always in a better position than Weitian; Beng being in-between me and Weitian and that I should have used him more for 1-2 or juz... 2. I suspect Beng isn't too fond of Weitian... Could it be Beng knew in advance of Weitian's Unholy feet aura? *Taps chin*

-- Male bonding in Jase's hall. Also via internet with Yiyuan. Those who want more details can refer to either Jase, Ed, Snake or Sw. (limbei oredi post this up liao, the rest is up to you guys...)
What male bonding? Wat's happening? Got back-breaking news never share sibo?

That's all for now folks.
Till the next match.
And BerD, you rock.

PS: Oh yah, before I forgot. One important after match incident involving Weitian, his feet, unholy smell and tons of jokes about it. Best be told over kopi....

PPS: Anyway thanks guys... For not getting into any fights... Cos they're afterall my frens also then very hard on me lah if we had gotten into a fight juz like the other time... So all and all it was a splendid match! Kudos to one and all! Special mention to xw's supervisor for scheduling him for work on that fateful morning as well... Thanks bro... Whoever and wherever you are... LmaO!

Friday, March 03, 2006

RECCOS Forum

Yes, the recent reminders abt the forum being down is more than enough now thanks. I understand your concerns and here's my gosu solution:

I changed the hyperlink on the right from "http://reccos.4ever.cc" to "http://quicktopic.com/gibberish.berd.rocks" and voila! (Cos the re-directing domain service has been terminated...) Nevertheless, you guys can now click on the link to get to the RECCOS Forum!!!

Although it seems like 1 more step to get to the forum... But at least you peeps would be forced to visit the RECCOS Blog every other day and hopefully, you peeps would be inspired to write here some day!

P.S: To date only a handful have accepted the invite but still havent posted.

SOCCER THIS SUNDAY 9am NTU FIELD WEAR BLUE!


Confirmed: BerD, Billy (1st half only), Beng, GooSe, Timmy, Snake, Sf, Sw, Jason...
Some more? Eh siao liao lah! We not enough people ah?!

PP.S: Alex who contacting? Gabriel? Who else can? The rest I know cannot liao... People like Xw and Philip...

SOCCER WATCHING THIS SAT NIGHT 1030pm DOVER KOPITIAM/SNAKE'S LAIR!


At this meeting, I shall reveal 2 important pieces of news I've uncovered recently. 2 pieces of news that I'm sure would make everyone's jaws drop... Something to the extent of "GooSe is currently receiving special 1on1 intensive DoTa training from myself."

So be there to hear it from the Anaconda's mouth! Exact venue to be confirmed.

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Lunch with whoa... a whole chink-gang of people.

I think the porn me(in Goose's words) outing is growing everytime we make a trip down to makan with Berd da Anaconda.

I can remember, that the beginning was just me, Berd. (although we had Billy and my fren joinin us...)

Then the next time, Goose came along. But Billy couldn't join us.

Then today.

Sw the regular was here.
Goose and me as usual.
Snake managed to wake up(miracle!!!).
Even Lady Boss aka Miss Pei Pei joined us too.
Berd was of course there.

And we had to squeeze in one round table and ordered so much stuff that there were, on the last count:
14 bowls(got mee, got soup, got bak gu)
6 glasses
on the friggin' table.

It was quite a good lunch, topped with ciggys and kopi and not forgetting, FRIED ICE CREAM.
Sw the mad man claims that he has to run after lunch cos its too heavy.
Me and Berd are just contended to sit n smoke,
while the rest of them.. generally can't be bothered too.

Kinda cool actually to suddenly meet up out of the blue for lunch and mini talk cock session.
Not to forget some real life drama:
Mad/Stubborn/Idiotic Ah Pek tries to be a Yz.. I mean Ah Beng on the road by
1. trying to reverse on a main road with a relentless stream of cars.
2. trying to play punk and block the whole line of traffic by refusin to move an INCH, because he was waiting for a parking area next to the coffeeshop that we were at.
3. trying to reverse while blocking the whole line of traffic cos he wanted a parking space next to the coffeeshop that we were at.

We were watching this mini-drama unfold while chompin on our fried ice cream, smoking, drinking kopi etc etc.
Quite amusing I must add.
Though the blasting of horns did get to my nerves at some point of time.

Managed to drive Sw back to camp at the grand timing of 2-ish, after which dropped Goose and made my way back to the clubroom for another round of smoke break and slacking.

We should do this more often sia...

PS: Finally found a comrade in arms who HATE Strawberries!!! Berd... finally I have to admit. You're Gosu.

PPS: Sw's refusal to eat durian is still making me laugh....

Monday, February 20, 2006

Match Report 4

Date: 19/2/06

Location: NTU field something something. Noh... that one facing the other grandstand, ie: the one with the cricket pitch thingy in the middle.

Time: 930-ish am(waiting for the opponents and our missing players like Weitian, Yoon Keong and un-important player)

Score: RECCOS 0 - BP Seniors+ Etc 2

Scorers: Orange shirt wussy and Some etc guy whom I can't see clearly. Both in the middle of the 2nd half. Too disgusted to elaborate.

Match Highlights:

-- The size of the field. It was so small, I mean compact that no only did we have to worry about people standing out of position, there was pratically no space for the defence to 'rock' even. That was how tight the field was. No 'tight' in those 'football tips' sense lah....

-- Weitian our on-loan striker who almost scored a spectularly 'taiko' goal when he kicked the ball over and behind him, only for the damn ball to bounce in such awkward speed and velocity and direction that it eluded the keeper and 'tiang-ed' the woodwork.

-- The opposition's perception of offside. They can claim that we were offside cos one of us has pushed past the offside line, never mind if he wasn't interfering with play nor was he the receipent of the pass, hell, he wasn't anywhere in the vicinity when the pass was threaded lah!!!
F**kin NOOBS! And apparently, they were in the school team for BP. No wonder we lost so badly that time.

-- Alex's ugly but highly effective way of either bulldozing or sprinting past the opponents, which resulted in a good shot at goal after a particularly 'trying' run.

-- Series of incident regarding the Orange shirt wussy, who cannot dribble, run nor pass. But sure can make a lot of trouble. First was when he wanted to shove Xw for what? Backing into him after a jump for header. 2nd time was over some toopid foul and he had to get into the thick of action by jumping at(with quite a lot of gusto I might add) our abovementioned 'victim' for today, Xw.

--Xw once again getting harangued by this short fart of a basket case who, in Berd da Anaconda's opinion, must have the last say for everything. Everything. From fouls given to them to fouls given to us, he will have something to say and he will always have someone to piss out. Xw, these mere words cannot do the episodes justice. Just tell them the next time we meet up lah...

--Someone being branded a 'BIMBO'. On the pitch. Go figure who. He(she) is one of us...

-- One of our on-loan midfielder playing like he was having a walk in the park lydat. Even Seng look more gan cheong and moves faster than the mother son. And Seng is the keeper.

-- Bleddy muds monkeys making noises at the grandstand there telling us to end the game faster, which elicted comments such as: "Hey take your time!", "Hey relac abit ah!". And my personal favourite: "Since when NTU got so many monkeys ah?"(incidentally, I was the one who was saying the last comment but Berd advised me to keep it down in case I get charged with sedition or however you spell it...)

-- My absolutely ROCKING GOOD PERFORMANCE(especially in the first half) which made Sw comment that maybe I should go CPZ every Sat to improve my game. Glad to do it. All in the name of RECCOS.

That's all I can think of now.
Anything else, just DIY lah.

And where's our CLEAN SHEET?!?!?!?!?

Friday, February 17, 2006

Damn, its 3 days in a week...

That I have to meet Berd da Anaconda.

First day was the night where most, if not all couples or couples wanna-bes gather and meet up. While the LHC(Lonely Hearts' Club) alumni - as of now, lim bei, Berd, Goose, Ed and Seng - can take solace that at least our wallets were relatively untouched. Yesh, I had to meet Berd da Anaconda on Vday. How shiok is that?????? Not forgetting that he was with a gal, made me an ahmad while he was all cosy and comfy with Ter-ba-ba-boom at the back of my beloved Mini. Nabei. The last straw was when the bugger of a cheapskate actually asked for my flower(wtf?!?!?) as a gift for the above mentioned unlucky gal.
Sigh~~~~~~

Straight after Vday, met up with him for the fabled Macperson Hae Mee, Goose was the other willing party, where at this point of time I feel like saying something: SNAKE! You Booboo NOOB!!! Call you like 6, 297 times for at least 20+ minutes, but realised that it was futile, cos YOU NEVER PICK UP THE FRIGGIN' PHONE. Best of all, we tried calling your house only to have your dad saying this:

*Conversation replicated to the best of my memory.
Me: Arlo, Uncle ah, is YZ at home?
Uncle Bai: Eh? Hold on ah...
*few minutes later Uncle Bai: I think he sleeping, can you try calling his handphone? Me: Erm... thanks uncle. (hangs up)

I was too paiseh at that point of time to tell him that we were trying to do so UNSUCCESSFULLY for the past 20+ min.
Sigh~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Anyway the hae mee ROCKS. Serious. Goose has already testified to that in the forum. I concur too. Should and would be making another trip there in the near future, seeing that I am ever so free, and Wed being Goose's free day, wahhaahahahahahaha!!

Thought that would be the last I see of Berd, at least till the next soccer session or something. But no~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The cock-a-nathan had to get himself holan-ed somewhere at Normanton Park there, couldn't ge the last bus, and was unable to hail a cab in the most bizarre place ever.
NOOB.
So what was the next best thing he did? Call lim bei to see if I was on the way to save his sorry arse. Lucky for him, unlucky for me. I was on the way home.
From town no less. Sigh...
And the NOOB had the audacity to question my road sense by SMS-in me and exclaiming that I drove past the pick up point cos he wasn't PRO enough to differentiate my car.
And where was I at the moment?
Taking my time to choose between flavours for chips while waiting for my car to be refuelled. At Holland V.
Muhaahahahahahaahaha!!!

Managed to get him in the end, send him back, and did something which is probably the highlight of this week, beating even my EXPERTLY TIMED CHAIN FROST WHICH HAD MY FRIEND KOW-TOWING TO ME(this bit is for Dota players. Bleah!!!).

*Drum roll.... WE PEE-ED in the multi storey carpark opposite Berd's house.
SONG BO?!?!?!!?!?!?!?!!?!

Topped it up with a smoke, and home it was.

Sigh... I really need to do something about this sia. The number of times I meet that cock is probably more than the times I meet up with some other guys in a sem(ie: Ws, Daren...)

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

Kopi with Berd and friends...

Had a cuppa kopi with Berd da Anaconda just this evening.
A cuppa of iced tea to be exact.
Seeing that I was near Clementi, and that he was in Clementi, I thought to myself, why not?

And so I was, in a coffeeshop with Berd and his friends.

There were quite a number or them, but I'm a sucker for remember names.
Remembered Melvin clearly though.
Cos he built of the same mould as Berd da Anaconda, ie: SUPER Good Cockster.
Serious.
It was friggin' hilarious talking with him. He is one solid fellow sia.
And his actions.
Can fight with Berd.
From telling us about what happened in his camp instructor(or something) days to his RV sec school cock-a-nathan incidents(most memorable being this freak guy that can salivate half a beaker of saliva....), he did it with the same gusto as Berd re-enacting a particular farnni cock story.
No wonder they friends sia~~~

Anyway, nothing much this post,
just wanna say thanks Berd, for the teh, the ciggys, the company and the wonderful people I've met today.

PS: Wed's heh mee is on. Who wants to jump on the bandwagon(ie: lim bei's car) please holler out asap. As of now, the confirmed strength is me, Goose, Berd and Billy(Berd claims he will psycho him). Sw da regular seems swayed, Snake.. if he can wake up at least. And of cos, XW, who can just go there watch us eat?

Saturday, February 11, 2006

Lunch With Nano-Bots and Nobody

Nabei.
Sometimes I dunno whether to slap or whack Timmy da Smeagol.

Supposed to meet him for lunch yesterday afternoon, after hearing him wax lyrical about coming to eat the all elusive MacPherson Hae-Mee(ie: Prawn Mee...) I decided to wait out a roaring hungry stomach.

And what happened?

That kok-ster of an Smeagol, due his morning sleep all the way after 12:30pm... Must've seen assumed his mum didnt cook or something(this one ask that cock to tell you all about it... I can't be bothered liao) and ASSUMED/PRESUMED/THOUGHT that he was free to go out to lunch with me.

Like what they love to say in the chao Army:
"You think, I thought, who CONFIRM?"
"If you ASSUME, you'll make an ASS out of U and ME!"

And indeed he did. So what happened?

Lim bei happily waited for him, risked the chance of getting on my sup's bad books by rejecting his lunch offer, along with the other office ladies' lunch invitations and putting up with endless hungry pangs... Finally getting to 12:30pm...
Only to find him EATING at home.

KNNBCCB!!!

This one lim bei still can tahan.
Until the Smeagol have to say something:
"Make you wait and miss all the lunch with others, SONG BO?!?!?!?"

KNN.

TIMMY YOU F**KING NOOB!!!

Ended up eating Lonely Hae Mee... Luckily, it was raining... Rain + kickass ASS Hae-Mee + Kopi + No Umbrella + 1 pack of cigs + Lonely Heart's CLub = Eat Lunch and Kopi Alone with Cigs While Waiting For the Rain To Stop... Apart from being alone, it wasnt too bad lah...

PS: Timmy will be coming over again to have lunch with me... So hopefully GooSe or Snake or Seng can come?

PPS: I think I still rock as hard... V(^^,)V

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Lunch with Berd and Billy

Nabei.
Sometimes I dunno whether to slap or whack Berd da Anaconda.

Met him for lunch this afternoon, after hearing him wax lyrical about some Macperson Heh-Mee(ie: Prawn Mee, not his Heh-heh making noodles for us or something...) I decided to check out whether it was myth or truth.

And what happened?

That kok-ster of an Anaconda, during his morning trek towards Semens.. I mean Siemens building, must've seen them peeling prawns or something(this one ask that cock to tell you all about it... I can't be bothered liao) and ASSUMED/PRESUMED?THOUGHT that they were open for business.

Like what they love to say in the chao Army:
You think, I thought, who CONFIRM?

So what happened?

Lim bei happily drove there, risked the chance of getting orh kong(fined) and brave the heat and dust and hunger, finally reaching the end of the journey.
Only to find them preparing for TOMORROW's business.

KNNBCCB!!!

This one lim bei still can tahan.
Until the kok-ster have to say something:
"Make you waste petrol and drive all the way here, SONG BO?!?!?!?"

KNN.

BERD YOU F**KING NOOB!!!

Ended up eat bah chow mee.
Lucky for him, the alternative was good. One of the better bah chow mee I've eaten.
And he's right. They came in some big ass black plastic Ferro-fibrous(those who play MechWarrior might know what I talking about) bowls.
Then Berd activitated Billy aka Rubbish aka Tzehao.

OMFG?!?!?!
Semens personnel no need to work one meh? (did I just say semens, I meant Siemens, as usual)
And so in a few mikes time.
Billy was plopping his arse on a seat next to me liao.
I concluded.
Siemens personnel no need to work one. (plus later we had another of Berd's friend who joined us. Also a Siemens personnel)
In another, well, ar-chally alot of mikes time, we were all eating fried ice cream nearby.
The ice cream also ROCK sia.

That's when I've decided.
I shall have a personal goal this sem:
Meeting up with all the NTU IA-ers for lunch or something.
Those interested can holler out.

PS: Going to meet the Berd sometime again, soon... for the elusive Heh-Mee.

PPS: I still think Berd is a kok-ster.

Monday, February 06, 2006

Match Report 3

Date: 5/2/2006

Location: NTU grass plain(main field, but the grass there super dry and tough sia, slide already can skin you alive)

Time: 930-ish am(I was late I know, but the opponents also mah...)

Score: RECCOS 0 - Shaowei's Friend's Team 1

Scorers: Orange shirt pussy/wuss/sissy who make noise at ANY, and I mean, any tackle. (2nd half of 1st half)

Match highlights:

-- Leaping salmons. Not us though. The bleddy opponents who can jump damn high, hang in the air for quite some time, and are generally taller than most of us. Explains why they keep winning the high balls.

-- Berd da Anaconda playing all of us for fools when the muthason came on.. I mean, walked on the pitch declaring that time was almost up, but giving us/and the opponents some time so as not be appear 'biased'. Or something lydat. I too far and too lazy to bother about what he was trying to communicate in his Klingon tongue. Anyway the bugger had everyone waiting in the hot, sorching, blistering sun for a good 5 minutes while the poor "Great Wall of China"(I will explain later) keeper went to pick up the ball, lined up for a 1x good goal kick, and proceeded to declare half time when the ball was floating in the mid air. Bastard. Burn him I say.

-- Da goal that did us in. A foul by our midfield engine Sw(who didn't exactly slide in the whole game cos he wuss) led to the ball being positioned by the edge of the box. Lim bei tried to concoct a semblance of a wall to block his view but apparently that was not enough. Next thing we know, the ball floated in to the back of the net. Nabei.

-- Yz aka Snake aka Xiao Bai's 'Ric Flair'-ism. He rocks. 1st example. The offside by the opponents during the first half. He just stood there. Raised his hand. Shouted 'offside' in a voice that demanded no reply. And then, proceeded to shame the opposition into giving us the ball. 2nd and BEST example. Corner kick. Ball floated in. Lim bei wanted to siam. Ball coming f**king fast. Ball connected with lim bei's head. Ball ricochet out for another corner. Striker for the other team stood his ground and protested for a corner, claiming that no one touch the ball for their side. XB claim that we also neber~~~ therefore the logic is: You neber touch the ball. We also 'neber' touch the ball. So its our ball lor. At that point of time. I decided to keep my trap shut. Plus Gab was telling me to keep quiet also. Once again. XB rrrrocks~~~~

-- Anil da Chin-dian's comment about the opposing goal keeper. In his words, he wanted to poke the ball, then saw this "Great Wall of China" looming in front of him. So what happen-ed? Cannot score lah~~~

I think that's all I can remember for now.
Nuffin special on our side.
Sigh.....

Where's our clean sheet??!??!?!

Tuesday, January 31, 2006

A Rolling Stone Gathers No Moss

- printed in micro-fabric bold against an outrageous red background across Timmy Boy's chest.

Here's a thought-provoking and catchy catchline which caught my cunning eye on some kewl Chinese New Year gathering we had at the Snake's Lair; not new to you guys cos you peeps probably heard it from me countless of times to the point of irritation.

Remember my sole purpose in life is to irritate the shit out of you guys to see how much stick you guys can take and tolerate before you officially declare me a 大人。 I realised the more shit you're willing to put up with an idiot, the more you consider him as a brudder deep down inside. As such, the following shall now be assumed: Irritation being the official yardstick to measure brudderhoodship by and BerD, the official SI unit for irritation.

Here's an example for the slow and fat on the proper usage of the newly coined term:

BerD:
Timmy: "Woah, that BernarD da AnaConDa is one sonnawabeetch man... He was like damn irritating lah during the car ride back home... Cant stand him balls."
GooSe: "Huh! Really? And how irritating was he?"
Timmy: "The fuck I know? Perhaps 3 BerDs much?"
GooSe: "Really?! 3 BerDs much?! Coolness." (o.O)

Back to that kickass phrase: A Rolling Stone Gathers No Moss.

Saying it alone makes me feel 3 times as cool as before.

A rolling stone gathers no moss.

.

.

.

.

9 times as cool now. Coolness...

Honestly, I'm still struggling to figure the exact meaning behind this kickass phrase. It seems that it's got a truckload of possible permutations of meanings to it... Well here's Timmy's interpretation of it is and at face-value: "When you're on a roll, there's no stopping ya!" Well I guess Timmy was just bent on going to the Snake's Lair to win money in CNY's context! Cheerios anyway... Time to sleep!

An annual affair...

Damn... how noob can I get.
Forgot to bring the camera once again, to capture the shots of us invading the Snake's lair.

Once again, kudos to the Snake for letting us invade his lair.
More so for his generous parents who didn't mind our noise, our shameless-ness, and of course, our betting. (Snake's dad ROCKS lah, the way he was throwing the $$ around, not exactly throwing and expecting us to catch, but you guys get the idea.)

Ah.....................................................

We really need trips like this to make Chinese New Year complete sia.

And now, presenting the winners:

1. Mok Syndicate
-- KNNBCCB, thy powers combine doeth spell our doom. Serious!!! What kind of banker can lose the first round when everyone betted small small amount, then whack the living daylights out of us in the final round with a ban-ban(Goose, I can feel your pain...) Insidious sia...

2. Miss Bai Shiqi(aka the 2nd sis)
-- kaoz, lucky I smart this year to join force with her, if not I sure UP the lorry one. An example of how lucky she is: Opened the cards to see a big Jack and a red 5. Drew the other card, see also no need to see then flip it open liaoz. Imagine lim bei's surprise to see a 6 staring back at me. KNN!!! I don't even dare to do that lah... unless I win 1x big one. But I never~~~~~~~~~~~

3. Seng the lame cock... rooster I mean.
-- not a big amount, but still, enough for him to break the curse of losing at the Snake's lair every year. This year, we just can't skin the bleddy cock, I mean rooster.

4. The unknown cousin
-- my gawd... dunno us well still there to cheat our money. Everytime whack 10+ bucks. Lim bei banker he still dare to Blackjack somemore. Ah~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


And the losers, in not order whatsoever...

1. Berd da Anaconda.
-- lost so much even I was sweating for him. More details please harangue the man to tell us more.

2. Beng da suai one.
-- won in the beginning. But his round as banker wiped out everything. Had to fork out money somemore. Suai sia~~~

3. Goose.
-- won some in the end, no thanks to Uncle's insidiuous plans to make us Up the bet. Lucky lim bei neber greedy. If not Goose's goh leng sure kill me one.

4. Timmy/Smeagols.
-- nabei this year came with a bad feeling I was going to lose it and sure enough, banker first round kena Blackjack-ed. 2nd round won back a bit. Misc bettings all buang-ed. Until I double-teamed with winner no.2 (Snake's younger sis) to cut the losses. Looks good for my romance forecast for the rest of the year no?

5. Phil da bear bear.
-- dunno in the end he got win back or not, but hey, at least you scam-ed $50 for the Snake for his stint as banker.

6. Ed da Halal Pig
-- played so big at the beginning till he had to touch his reserves to cover the taxi fare for tonight. Lucky he left early if not maybe he'll lose more? I have no idea man...

7. Gab.
-- the fat bugger is suai. End of story. I see his cards I also want to cry sia...


For those who are not in the list, either you broke even or I don't friggin' know if you guys won or lost, so please update accordingly.

A comment from Berd which I find quite thought provoking.
"We irritate the shit out of each other, but how come we're still sticking together?"

Honestly, I have absolutely no idea but I intend to find out. Eventually.

PS: Think next year we get a freaking hamper for the family, this way, we will counter everyone.... The abalone really worked lah, since this year Snake didn't look like he was winning.......

PPS: Berd da Cock suggest we get Harlo Pussy, I mean Hello Kitty stuff for Snake's sisters. I forgot the logic behind it but I think it must have been a sucky one cos I refuse to register it in my mind...

Monday, January 30, 2006

A greeting...

Damn.
Just got a New Year Greeting from Daren.

Surprised?
You bet I am.

I mean, I(and of cos most of RECCOS, if not all) have not spoken to him(much) over this past year and he still bothered to sms me a new year greeting.
If I was a hot babe and all, probably I'll understand.
But I'm TIMMY, aka Smeagols aka god-knows-what...
Back to the topic.

Surprised that he still took the effort to sms me.
I was really quite shocked.
But touched.
Yes I was, cos I'll be lying if I said I wasn't.
I don't even bother sending to people I know. (But I did lah, not to you guys at least, muahahahahaha!!!)
Haiz...........
I guess its just his manner of saying, at the end of the day, we're still friends right.

In the meantime,
let's all make preparations for the visit to the Snake's lair.

PS: The friggin' hamper how ah?

Saturday, January 28, 2006

这么大粒!

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For the ignorant, Ann Kok ripped off her top to bare her barely bared bosoms during the 9pm show on Thursday! So count your lucky stars for BerD is here!

P.S: I accept gifts of thanks in the form of gor-ling and bao during BanLuck...

Friday, January 27, 2006

I kena-ed arrow...

CB, Berd the Anaconda just arrowed me this afternoon.
Claims that I have'nt blogged here for quite some time.

Kaoz.... where's the rest of the guys?
Where's the blogs from the rest of you?

I'm sure that you guys don't wanna keep reading about the escapades of me and Berd and the occasional 'deep' post by Jeff the Malaysian Beng.
*Jeff, where's the story that you promised??!?!?!?

Anyway have nothing new to blog nowadays.
Seriously.
Life has been boring.
No clubbings, no hanging out with horny army friends.
But wait.
Chinese New Year coming soon.
Maybe we'll have an adventure on the yearly trip to the Snake's lair to once again leech on the hospitality of his parents.

Seriously, I think that we should do something for Snake's parents.
I've heard this year, his mum got catering.
OMFG?!?!?!!?
We really should get them a hamper or something, poor as we are.
Agree?
*Those in favor, shout out yah?

In the meantime, back to my meeting.
Dota competition yah?

Monday, January 23, 2006

恭喜发财,马到功成!

Okay guys... I shall let you guys in on a little secret... I'm sure you all have heard of my raving success at Gentings juz over the lunar New Year and I'd bet you all are probably shitting in your pants right now... Worrying how much you'd lose to me over CNY...

Well being the benevolent BerD I am, I shall give you peeps a pointer or 2; but that doesn't mean you guys dont have to pray at all...

Introducing, the brand new series of CNY undies... Available in stores islandwide today!

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This set of undies comes complete in 3 different designs:

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Namely, 财, 龙, and 福.

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财: This legendary character is usually associated with prosperity and its riches that may follow the hero who dons this Sacred Relic. Add a quarterstaff costing $1150 or a Demon's Edge and a Claymore costing $1610 and $1400 respectively and you could end up with a Radiance or even THE Divine Rapier...

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龙: 龙, or the Dragon, symbolises the grandeur of the ancient Chinese dragon. Believed to be able to ward off evil spirits and cause rain and thunder whenever it surfaces... It too can add 台 to your MahJong hand in the form of 红中, 百版 and a 青发. Here, the 龙 symbolises the "bulge" underneath when one is wearing it...

"They looked like snakes and had no wings." - The first of dragons were 1st spotted in swamps deep in the South-American continent. They also say, the young of a dragon is also known as an Anaconda. RAWR!

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福: Here, it represents happiness and general well-being of family members, heh hehs, ter-ner-ners and other loved ones... But honestly, it's not going to help much against You-Know-Wat.

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And that's not all! It even comes with a complimentary packet of red packets! So wat are you waiting for?!

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Get yours today!

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But, not that I think it'd stand a chance against the original, formidable 恭喜发财,马到功成 though... But regardless, here's wishing one and all in advance a prosperous 恭喜发财 Chinese New Year ahead! =)

Sunday, January 22, 2006

Match Report 2

Date: 21/01/06

Location: NTU (not-too-bad) swamp... Slightly mud-filled pitch this time round...

Time: 9am(We started pretty much on time! YEAH!)

Score: RECCOS 3 - 4 ACJC Sportsmen

Scorers:
RECCOS - Shaowei (header), Teck Beng (right foot with black toe), Philip (right hand)
Opponents - 4 fellas who simply got lucky well no thanks to me...


I feel absolutely gutted. Today we played a pretty decent game of soccer, which Philip almost threatened to ruin... Although the referee was like Jason-playing-Lesharc-in-DOTA kind of crap, minus the fact that I single-handedly conceded 4 goals for RECCOS, it was a lovely Saturday morning of soccer...

(1) Xuanwei and Shaowei combined well to put RECCOS ahead from a corner... A tantalising ball floated into the enemy's 6 yard box found a determined Mokie's head! GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAL! Well it's not like we trained this set-piece every week but I thought it was almost EPL standard! Special mention on the stupid referee - He asked Xw to take the corner from way behind the corner spot such that according to Xw, he saw 2 players between the posts from where he was standing! Bizarre indeed.

(2) I forgot how our 2nd goal came about but perhaps it was some neat work by Luke down the right which left Teck Beng 1 on 1 with the keeper... Right foot step-over, black toe INTO THE CORNER! GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAL!

(3) Our 3rd goal was the result of Shaofeng's blind optimism to pump in a hopelessly hopeless ball which somehow to rather found Philip at the far post with a handy right hand... Muahahha! Kudos to Shaofeng for his hard work man...

But still, all of that wasn't enough as we conceded 4 goals... All of which we can learn from, except perhaps the last.

(i) Goal number 1 came from our left. I cant remember if it was their counter or something but their right winger hit a ball in pretty early and the defense was caught out of position... That number 25 was sneaking behind me I was certain about it but I failed to cut out the ball... Gawd. BerD you noob!

(ii) Goal number 2 was more or less illegitimate... The ball was hit over me and I was pretty sure the guy's offside cos when I turned my back... I saw Timmy and Yz chasing him frantically! I think it would have looked more convincing if we didnt give chase but then again... Anyone would have given chase instinctively... Basically I think we need to work a lot still on our offside trap man... Or maybe dont work on it at all and not play the offside entirely...

(iii) Goal number 3 from that throw-in was numb as well... Timmy "passed" that number 25 to me to mark another... And as I turned to watch the ball, he snuck past me to the near post for a simple tap in... OMG BerD you fucken noob! I think I also got 1 big window of concentration lapse during matches de... I better be watching out more often man...

(iv) Goal number 4 was the worst of all. I am AnaConDa-sure the ball was slightly blown away by the wind... It swung out slightly to the right so suddenly... Initially I had wanted to head the ball and since now I wasnt exactly going to be below the ball, I tried to clear it 1st time but alas - it bounced right under me. GG no RE. OMFG BerD YOU n00b!

Other incidents worth mentioning:
- Philip kicking an opponent over like kicking a can away whilst walking down Orchard road, hence a yellow card.
- GooSe also got a yellow card for XXX (Pls edit and insert accordingly.)
- Luke playing rather well for us and with us.
- BerD with a song-song Ryan Giggs tackle in the penalty box juz before end of 1st half to deny them yet another chance.
- Timmy doing a windmill move taken out of a breakdancing textbook and hooking the ball away.
- BerD finally playing the offside trap correctly for once somewhere in the 2nd half! YEAH~!

Thursday, January 19, 2006

What a wonderful world~~~

The world can be pretty damn wonderful sometimes.
Really, no kidding.
Take today for example, seeing that there was no lessons for me and much less incentive for me to stay home, I decided to meet up with some of them ole' army pals. (actually I planned to meet them since last week liao lah...)
So where do 4 guys go for lunch in the middle of the afternoon with nothing planned in the afternoon?

To town of cos!!!

And boy did we made the correct choice!!!

I dunno issit connected or not, but maybe on Goose's birthday(btw, Happy Birthday Goose!!!) all the birds/babes/chais/cha bors come out to play sia.
And I really mean good stuff cannot bluff.

First sighting was at the top level of Far East Shopping Centre, some chicken rice stall. First we saw a cha bor showing 3/4 of her bra and more than a peek at her humps inside the garment. Chicken rice never tasted so good before. And at the same stall, when we were paying, a bunch of ang moh chais came in. Only the middle looked like flower. The 2 bodychecking her looked more like cauliflowers.

Next we moved on the the ground floor of the shopping centre to have a puff after the sights and the meal, but not before we passed by a n**ple baring member of the opposite sex sitting just outside the chicken rice stall. Damn-ed if my hum sup friend Horny didn't want to order another plate of chicken rice. Now back to the ground floor.

Sightings there was quite sparse, most them smokers being guys and all, but all was not lost when we finished our puff and decided to go for a stroll at the basement to
1. find something else to eat, chicken rice not filling.
2. check out this supposedly chio ah lian but turned out to be an *choke* ah lian. Another case of 'Beethovan'.
3. to enjoy the aircon since it was like friggin' hot outside.
The basement tour was a total flop.
There was no food to eat, the members of the opposite sex were either aunties or school gals who will make one kena the famous 376(though Berd might go for these kinds).

That was when I began to lose hope in the state of the world.

Until we saw her.

Wah kaoz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This one here I tell you, swear to god or whoever is up there.
Is.
Solid!!!
Good stuff really cannot bluff.
Serious.

I can still remember what she wore.
A burgundy top(I know the colour!!! Cos my friend was signalling to her and told us to watch his tracer, like Berd/Goose/Edwin on a hunt for chai lydat)

A black skirt,
with a F**KING SLIT BEHIND!!!!!

I kid you not.
There was a freaking slit behind the skirt, when I used to thought that all the slits in a skirt was at the side?
How wrong I was.
The freaking slit was so freaking high, I could see her F**KING ARSE!!!!!!

*nosebleed*

This account is really true, dun believe, Snake if you reading this can confirm with Kevin Wee and can tell the non-believers about the authenticity of this shit.

We followed her all the way from Far East to Lucky Plaza.
Bonus: Her friend was wearing a white skirt. And according to what limited prowess I possess, I am around 75% sure she wearing G-String.

Last stop was at the Burger King opposite Lido, although we wanted to sit in Starfucks, I mean bucks initially. But since it rained and BK provided better shelter, off we went.
And what did we see there?
Gals in white uniform running in to take cover from the rain. Apparently they're from ISS, which I have no idea what f**k school that is, but its filled with ah mohs, and orh per, and pha zeng(ie: mixed).
Rain and white uniform. Solid. Plus some of them smoked. But too noisy for our taste. So we didn't really pay much attention to them.
Until we were about to leave, then we saw this one. This also sibei solid one sitting opposite us in Starbucks.
In my friend's words, she possessed a "nice cleavage".
In my words, you can "TF"(T*t F**k) her.

*Nose bleed*

And I think to myself..... what a wonderful world....

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

On the 3rd Day of IA, my Sup~ Gave to ME...

16th Jan - Start of IA

Well as most of you peeps already know, I was posted to Siemens @ MacPherson for my Industrial Attachment. But what most of you goons dont know is, RubbisH aka Tze Hao was posted there as well. However, during the ice-breaker session, I've decided that since RubbisH wasn't exactly a presentable name to introduce yourself with to others, enter: Billy Ong Tze Hao. So here's a RECCOS update: RubbisH is Tze Hao, and Tze Hao is Billy. But if you ask me, I still like RubbisH better.

Okay Siemens seems like a pretty decent company... However my job scope requires me to work on Saturdays as well. As such, Saturday morning soccer sessions are a DEFINITE NO-NO. I say again, SATURDAY MORNING SOCCER SESSIONS ARE A NO-GO. Roger wilco? On the bright side, I'd be compensated a little more for my travelling down on Satudays.

There aint much of pretty and milfy Office Ladies in my office that's worth mentioning, except for that one attached Ah-Lian to whom we file our claims to. According to my upper-study, she's not to be provoked; you can only say she chio, cannot do or say anything else. But since she's juz some beetch you see everyday under some manager's desk, I've got every intention to ki with her. Cos provoking others, I've come to realise, is my BanKai (forte).

My Supervisor, as it appears, loves me. Apparently for some reason, he knows how much ASS I can really kick the moment he saw me and even confessed he's so glad to have gotten me amongst the other nerds who were attached there (Billy, fortunately or not, not included. He's on the 12th storey, I'm on the 6th.) We chatted briefly and I realised 1 of the main reasons why he love me down to my toes is bcos he juz cant come to terms with the very fact that I'm not a Malay.

And that's juz the 1st day. The highlight of the 2nd day has got to be that kickass Prawn Mee. I tell you... Prawn Mee Pwns Me. GG no RE. Those who wanna try it can jio me... It's of cos somewhere near Potong Pasir MRT station. $3.50 for big kickass prawns, and the soup is really some FWAH LUAN NUEH?!

But of cos, my IA is not all good and nothing bad; if there's 1 fucking thing I DO hate about my workplace... It's... It's... An Ah-Tiong. He's smart no doubts abt that... But the 1 thing that really puts me off is his funky smell. When I say funky smell, I dont mind Edwin's manly odour - I meant some 40 year old cock cheese smell that's totally funky now that's what I meant. I hate that funky smell.

But you know wat? That's not the best part. Listen right up - That's not the worst fucking part. You know wat's a bigger headache than an Ah-Tiong? Anyone? 1 word. 1 syllable. 3 letters. Yup, you got it.

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A GAY Ah Tiong. The problem lies with his short-sightedness. And I perfectly understand that wearing a pair of nerdy pairs would make him look funkier than he already smell... But he doesnt understand the fact that hanging out with a kickass fella like me doesnt automatically qualify him as a cool dude - You've got to have an AnaconDa to even be considered as one! And bcos he cant really see properly, he sticks his nose like 5cm away from my mouth when he's talking to me... And that's totally funky man. Gay too. Geez.

Last but not least, the reason why I'm blogging today and why I haven't been to work for the whole day is bcos after getting off work at 6pm and shopping for clothes till about 10pm... I actually went (home first then rode) down to Buona Vista MRT station at 12 midnight to check out the things they do on the site. Yup! Siemens has got a hand in almost everything I have also juz come to realise. My Sup mentioned since he hasnt got anything for me in office, he thought that perhaps the best reason and excuse to give a day off is to ask me down to the site and watch some black Blangah work. We ended at about 4am and for that half a night of chatting, I got a day off! And nope, it's not transferable so I still have to ask about Saturday.

With this day off, I achieved plenty having done loads of admin. I dont think you guys are bothered with what I did but here's my spending record for the past 3 days to wow you guys a little:

Monday:
$29.00 - G2000 working class shirt.

Tuesday:
$29.00 - G2000 working class shirt.

Wednesday:
$12.57 - A full tank of Shell 95.
$102.00 - 6 months of parking at the multi-storey carpark below my block.
$56.00 - A month of train concession ($45 for concession, $11 for admin)
$45.25 - Road tax for my motor for 6 months.

Song bo? Oh and did I mention abt the cute Sec 2 girl queuing up behind me for her concession too? (>.<) Ah she's a cute one... Hehehehehez!

Monday, January 16, 2006

Match Report

Date: 15/01/06

Location: NTU swamp... mud-filled pitch to be exact

Time: 9am(though we did start later)

Score: RECCOS 4 - Timmy's idiot bro's team 2

Scorers: RECCOS - Goose(1 min)
Xuanwei(last 20min-pen)
Xuanwei(last 20min)
Seng(last 15 min)
Opponents - No. XX* (somewhere in the 30+ min)
No. 20(first 10 min of 2nd half)

*eh guys, who remembered the no. of the scorer for their first goal please enlighten me, thanks.

Match Highlights

-- Goose opening the floodgates in less than a minute. According to my bro(he was complaining to me during dinner), Goose scored the fastest ever goal recorded by RECCOS(I think so lah, cos it was really pretty damn quick, agree?) at the grand time of...... 20+ seconds.
Cool eh?

-- Our famous "first half of the first half", when once again, we were guilty of the phenomenon of losing concentration after playing a good first half of the first half. Meaning: we can play like men possessed(twice!!), stroke the ball around, befuddling the opponents, dribble the shit out of them, shoot like Gerrard... you get the picture. Then we lose concentration. And then we play like shit. Headless chickens in fact. Haiz...

-- Our porous defence. Leaking goals like mad again. No thanks to the noob-ish efforts of Jase the Oyster. Dun bluff... what you dive too late for the first goal. You didn't wanna dive right? Think we dunno. 2nd goal. Berd da Anaconda. You suck. Big time. Let the bugger run past you and expect me to go defend?!?!!?!?!? How I know you not going to tackle him. Aiyo~~~ Can't blame Jase for not punching the ball out, he never learn Shou-u-gen(front, down, front-left, front + punch). We really need to work on our defence sia, long time no keep clean sheet liaoz.

-- '2nd half of the 2nd half'. I don't know how and why, but apparently, we always get our 2nd wind, especially when we are not leading. We do play well sporadically. We just need to work on these periods to be longer.

-- Xw the Veggie Monster and his immortal quote. A classic one that can compete with our Hair King's Seng-ism. Here it is: "Wo ren ni hen jiu leh hor!!!" (loosely translated, it means I endured you for very long liao hor!!!) What happened?
Some xia-lan guy with a case/wrist support shit was irritating him the whole of the match, people taking ball for corner, then start shoving Xw liao. The fuck? But the moment that triggered the outburst was the mindless, needless scything tackle that he made on Xw when the veggie monster was lining up for 1x good shot.
Damn. That rocks. Thought we were going to have another fistfight with my bro's idiot team again. But when I looked to the left of me, I realised that this might be our lucky break. Cos Snake is still in OUR HALF!!! He still haben run up to to whack the shit out of them yet!!! MY GAWD!!! I guessed the mantra worked, Snake, repeat it after us again: I will not FIGHT today...

-- Xw despite being peeved, still managed to score a brace of goals. One was a penalty lah. But the 2nd goal he scored. Magificant. Let him tell you more about it.

-- Seng our inspirational and Hairy Captain being on form. Scored a goal and run the opponents ragged. Nuff said.

-- Timmy as right back never cocked up. Much. 3 cheers for me. :)

And that's the report folks.... feel free to add in any stuff that I missed out.

Saturday, January 14, 2006

One Train May Hide Another — by Kenneth Koch

One Train May Hide Another — by Kenneth Koch
(sign at a railroad crossing in Kenya)


In a poem, one line may hide another line,
As at a crossing, one train may hide another train.
That is, if you are waiting to cross
The tracks, wait to do it for one moment at
Least after the first train is gone. And so when you read
Wait until you have read the next line--
Then it is safe to go on reading.
In a family one sister may conceal another,
So, when you are courting, it's best to have them all in view
Otherwise in coming to find one you may love another.
One father or one brother may hide the man,
If you are a woman, whom you have been waiting to love.
So always standing in front of something the other
As words stand in front of objects, feelings, and ideas.
One wish may hide another. And one person's reputation may hide
The reputation of another. One dog may conceal another
On a lawn, so if you escape the first one you're not necessarily safe;
One lilac may hide another and then a lot of lilacs and on the Appia
Indent_white_space_block_2_letters_2Antica one tomb
May hide a number of other tombs. In love, one reproach may hide another,
One small complaint may hide a great one.
One injustice may hide another--one colonial may hide another,
One blaring red uniform another, and another, a whole column. One bath
Indent_white_space_block_2_letters_2may hide another bath
As when, after bathing, one walks out into the rain.
One idea may hide another: Life is simple
Hide Life is incredibly complex, as in the prose of Gertrude Stein
One sentence hides another and is another as well. And in the laboratory
One invention may hide another invention,
One evening may hide another, one shadow, a nest of shadows.
One dark red, or one blue, or one purple--this is a painting
By someone after Matisse. One waits at the tracks until they pass,
These hidden doubles or, sometimes, likenesses. One identical twin
May hide the other. And there may be even more in there! The obstetrician
Gazes at the Valley of the Var. We used to live there, my wife and I, but
One life hid another life. And now she is gone and I am here.
A vivacious mother hides a gawky daughter. The daughter hides
Her own vivacious daughter in turn. They are in
A railway station and the daughter is holding a bag
Bigger than her mother's bag and successfully hides it.
In offering to pick up the daughter's bag one finds oneself confronted by
Indent_white_space_block_2_letters_2the mother's
And has to carry that one, too. So one hitchhiker
May deliberately hide another and one cup of coffee
Another, too, until one is over-excited. One love may hide another love
Indent_white_space_block_2_letters_2or the same love
As when "I love you" suddenly rings false and one discovers
The better love lingering behind, as when "I'm full of doubts"
Hides "I'm certain about something and it is that"
And one dream may hide another as is well known, always, too. In the
Indent_white_space_block_2_letters_2Garden of Eden
Adam and Eve may hide the real Adam and Eve.
Jerusalem may hide another Jerusalem.
When you come to something, stop to let it pass
So you can see what else is there. At home, no matter where,
Internal tracks pose dangers, too: one memory
Certainly hides another, that being what memory is all about,
The eternal reverse succession of contemplated entities. Reading
Indent_white_space_block_2_letters_2A Sentimental Journey look around
When you have finished, for Tristram Shandy, to see
If it is standing there, it should be, stronger
And more profound and theretofore hidden as Santa Maria Maggiore
May be hidden by similar churches inside Rome. One sidewalk
May hide another, as when you're asleep there, and
One song hide another song; a pounding upstairs
Hide the beating of drums. One friend may hide another, you sit at the
Indent_white_space_block_2_letters_2foot of a tree
With one and when you get up to leave there is another
Whom you'd have preferred to talk to all along. One teacher,
One doctor, one ecstasy, one illness, one woman, one man
May hide another. Pause to let the first one pass.
You think, Now it is safe to cross and you are hit by the next one. It
Indent_white_space_block_2_letters_2can be important
To have waited at least a moment to see what was already there.

You can hear the poet, who died in 2002, read this magnificent poem here.

Extra: Kenneth Koch and Allen Ginsberg in a rhyming contest about Popeye and William Blake...
http://jacketmagazine.com/15/koch-popeye.html